20 Reminders For The Beautiful Girls, Struggling To Love Themselves
Let me paint you a picture of what a normal girl goes through the entire day.
She wakes up, opens Instagram and sees a selfie of a model, rolling off the bed with perfect, flawless skin and a hashtag which reads #IWokeUpLikeThis.
As she proceeds to make some tea, she will see an ad of a slimming juice pop up on her notification bar.
Moving ahead, the commercial of surgeries and artificial insemination appear on the screen.
Settling on the chair to begin the day, her asshole colleague will make a nasty remark on her body.
Later in the day, as she is sharing a laugh at lunch, taunts are tossed around because of the way she expresses herself.
Coming back from home and going to work, she finds herself lost in the thoughts of self-doubt.
“Am I good enough? Will I ever be enough?”
To her, I wanna say, NO! You will never be enough for those who fail to accept you.
A system that is very consciously designed to demean and disrespect women, finding the courage to love yourself is an act of rebellion. All this noise often leaves Women in a whirlwind of complexes and insecurities.
To all those beautiful girls, struggling to love themselves, here are some reminders that you must repeat to yourself.
1 There’s nothing wrong in being the smart, nerdy one of your bunch.
There’s nothing sadder to me than a woman, who has to dial down her smartness because of what people might think of her. You are allowed to project your glorious self on people, however, you may please.
2 Taking responsibility for your mistakes is an essential step towards your improvement.
You must, in clear conscience, take responsibilities for your actions. You are allowed to make mistakes, as long as you strive to learn from them.
3 The past is a teacher, not a friend.
No matter how sweetly it comes in your memories, your past is not your friend. You can learn from it, but you cannot let it rest in your mind. Move on from it, like you used to do in schools.
4 Not everyone is your friend and that is okay.
Yes. Societies were made for survival, not rejoice. You must not strive to find friends as you won’t find any.
There will be a couple of people that you can count on, find them and cherish them forever.
5 There is nothing wrong in seeking help from others.
As much as you hate it, there is nothing wrong in seeking help from others. Identify the gravity of your situation and move ahead.
6 It is wrong to say yes when you want to say no.
You can and you should learn to say no to others when you want to. You don’t owe your affirmations to anyone. The sooner you learn to adopt this habit the better.
“Love yourself enough to set boundaries. Your time and energy are precious. You get to choose how you use it. You teach people how to treat you by deciding what you will and won’t accept.”
– Anna Taylor
7 You are the best company you can ever have.
Those who aren’t comfortable with themselves can never be comfortable with others. Learn to love your own company and find peace in your solitude. It is necessary for you to maintain a peaceful, harmonious relationship with your own self.
8 It is okay to cry every now and then.
Tears are good. Let them out every once in a while. Please, do not forget that you are human. And even crying has been stereotyped as a victim’s tool, your tears are very much valid and your suffering is not a choice. Let it out.
9 Comparing yourself to others is an insult to your beautiful self.
Yes, you can’t look like her. You wanna know why? Because you are not supposed to.
Stop breaking your heart when instead, you should be guarding it. Everything that you are, is all because some higher power wanted you to be. Stop comparing yourself.
10 Self care is not selfishness but survival.
Baths. Bubbles. Candles. Bliss. Restore yourself in all your moments of self-care. My mother always says people should be able to take care of themselves, no matter how busy they are. How you treat yourself is a manual for how you want others to treat you.
11 It’s okay not to have everything sorted right away.
No one, absolutely no one has their shit sorted out. And if they say they have, then they are lying. Give yourself the benefit and take your days as they come: one at a time.
12 No one care about your missed blow dry.
Because I am someone who struggles with the same issue, let me tell you, no one cares about your unstraightened hair and out of place curls.
If grooming heals you, do it. If not, just let it go, girl.
13 Stop finding your happiness in the same place you lost it.
The true definition of insanity is doing the same thing again and again and expecting a different result. Whenever you find yourself in a whirlwind of falling back to your old habits, remind yourself of all the pain and hurt you had to go through.
14 If you are going through hell, keep going.
I often recall this proverb in my intense times. You didn’t come this far only to come this far. One day, in retrospect, all your days of struggle will make sense to you! Just hang on, girl.
15 You owe it to yourself to follow your heart.
Once in a while, lose your own damn mind. Going crazy once will give you memories that will last for a lifetime.
“The love and attention you always thought you wanted from someone else, is the love and attention you first need to give to yourself.”
– Bryant McGillns
16 Slow progress is also progress.
Regardless of whatever you are trying to improve about yourself, slow progress is also progress. It is substantial and inspirational. Living this life is like driving in the night. You can only see a portion of the road ahead.
And such is life. Take it one step at a time, one day at a time.
17 So how much you have is not a measure for how happy you will be.
It’s the experience that counts. Not things.
Something that you can owe can also be owed by someone else. You deserve to spoil yourself with tangible items, but at the end of the day, they are just things and nothing else.
18 Your dreams do not have a statute of limitation.
“Obama retired at 55, Trump started at 70. Sydney is 3 hours ahead of Perth, but that doesn’t make Perth slow. Someone graduated at the age of 22 but waited 5 years before securing a good job. Someone became a CEO at 25 and died at 50. While another became a CEO at 50 and lived to 90 years Everyone in this world works based on their time zone. People around you might seem to be ahead of you and some might seem to be behind you. But everyone is running their own race, in their own time. Do not envy them and do not mock them. They are in their time zone, and you are in yours. Life is about waiting for the right moment to act. So relax. You’re not early. You’re not late. You are very much on time.”
19 Being pretty is not a tax you need to pay to exist.
No matter how much the society has told you so. You absolutely don’t need to be pretty. Rather, be kind, be sensitive, be compassionate, be understanding, be loving.
20 The only person you shouldn’t be able to live without is you.
You hear me, lady? You should be your priority. The only person you shouldn’t be able to live without is you.
Self-love is asking yourself what you need every day and then making sure you receive it.
To all the girls out there, I hope it helped.